New name, same stuff

First of all, once again I am on my phone! It is just too much trouble to go back and correct any grammatical errors! I cannot even believe I just said that! Grammatical errors are my biggest pet peeve! I cannot simply go to the library or someones house to use their computer either. My creativity does not work that way. If I don't finish it in the same sitting as I started, I lose interest. I cannot tell you how many first chapters of novels I have written. I am saving that for when the kids are grown and no one will be harmed if I type for several days straight. Also, I dont know if you can see paragraphs or not. I am separating my thoughts into paragraphs but it is all squashed together after I publish! Almost too much for me to take. Anyhoo: Tonight I just feel led to share a little of my story. I realize that my posts may tend to be redundant, but as long as the enemy is spreading lies, I will continue to spread the truth. I appreciate everyone who reads them anyway! I was a Christian for a very long time before I fully grasped the reality of what that means. I believed that Jesus died and rose from the dead and that He was God's Son. I believed all the Bible stories. I prayed almost every day, mainly for myself and my problems. I read my Bible, mainly when I was having trouble and needed advice. I thought I had all I needed. There were, however, a few issues in the Bible that I didn't agree with. In my mind, I thought that since this book had been written so long ago, that maybe some of God's opinions had changed. I didn't go to church for a period of about 10 years. I didn't really think I needed to. I felt weird about going with a bunch of people I didn't know. My shyness was the main reason for that. When I look back now, I can see that I was just barely getting by and sometimes I also wonder if I was really saved then. I can remember having doubts at times. So, what changed? Why am I different today? Change began when I began a real study of His Word. The more I learned, the more clearly I could see. It was like a veil was lifted from my eyes. I began to pray like never before. I pray all the time now. When something good happens, I give Him praise. When something bad happens to anyone, I lift them up. I have a heart for hurting people like never before. I started wanting to go to church every chance I could. I got over my shyness through 2 Timothy 1:7. "God did not give us a spirit of timidity, but of power, love and self-discipline." If timidness does not come from God, it can only come from the devil. I could not be writing this right now, if not for that verse. Not only that, I know now that believers NEED the church. There are many many times when the only encouragement I get all week is through the church. You certainly won't get encouragement from this world! I no longer want to do the things I used to. I don't care for partying anymore. I'd rather be home with my husband and kids. I want to be a better wife and mother. I am confident that staying at home is right for my family. Before, I always felt like I wasn't doing anything of value. Now, I know that there is nothing more valuable. I used to dream of a big house and lots of money. Now, I am content with the home that God has provided for us, in a way that only He could. My prayer is that my boys will grow up to be men of God and full of courage. We need lots more of those! Most importantly, I know that His Word is just as valid today as it was 2,000 years ago. I still go to it for advice but I also go to it for wisdom. For, I have found that "All scripture is God-breathed and is useful for teaching, rebuking, correcting, and training in righteousness." I also know now that I am saved, no doubt about it. There are days when those old feelings and doubts creep in. I still mess up. I get off track and drift away. But I can now recognize that it is my fault when that happens. God didn't move away from me. I moved away from Him. He isn't going anywhere.